First things first, DD went to the doctor last week and we found out she’s going to have a girl. She’s right at 20 weeks gestation and so in about 20 more weeks a bundle of pink and green joy shall attach itself permanently to my heart :). I did ask the doctor about drug testing, in front of DD and they both agreed. Happy to report that my daughter isn’t on any negative substances for her or for baby.
I guess I should be happy to report that DD has moved in with me. She has moved away from the father of the child, but that is only because the 21st of the month the Sheriff or his representative would displace them from the apartment. She packed up her clothing and I went to pick her up on Thursday. I fairly insisted that she make this move as she was calling me non stop about not having food and being hungry and frankly, I couldn’t take my child (or anybody else) being hungry. Last week I had been there on Monday to feed her, she called me on Wednesday to come but I was out of town and couldn’t and the fact that she said she had nothing to eat the entire day on Wednesday BOTHERED me so I told her that I was coming but that she would have to be prepared to come back with me. Funny now, the boy’s family seems to be more helpful to him. He had an unpaid ticket which they now seem agreeable to pay, he didn’t have a cell phone, but yesterday they were able to get him one so I’m glad to see that they are finally stepping up and seem to be inviting him back into the fold of their family.
There is still no talking sense into my daughter – she decided to let him continue to have use of her car, reasoning that he needed to be able to get around. Mind you – she’s stuck in my house because I have work to do and she’s not driving my car when I have need of it. I’ve stressed to her that my house isn’t one of ill repute so I hope NEVER to catch boyfriend in my home. The one thing I have in my favor is that she never knows when I’m coming or going which hopefully will keep him at bay. I did tell her however that its ok to date. Should he find some employment and have the money to take her to dinner and the movie, by all means go. See if they have a relationship beyond procreation… but that is the best I can do at compromise. I’m not paying for dates, or suggesting date locations, if she wants to see the boy – then try to do so under more conventional channels. Probably too much to ask, but…
Meanwhile, she is applying for jobs but as we discussed earlier, she’s at a disadvantage being pregnant and job hunting – while an employer can’t say pregnancy is a reason for not hiring her, who would willing put a pregnant woman on their insurance? She does have insurance of her own, but a potential employer can’t inquire and would naturally make an assumption. So I’m not necessarily stressing the fact that she find a job – I probably should. I don’t want her sitting around for 20 weeks though. So I’m open for suggestions on paths to steer her in a positive manner. What does a pregnant 19 year old do? Besides eat…. (Been to the grocery store AGAIN and spent 150 bux…, I’ve cooked full course meals and she definitely has an appetite).
I did stress to the boy that his primary objective is to be working on a place to move his family and a means of supporting them – he looks like a deer caught in the crosshairs but really, while she’s incubating, he needs to be making the nest ready.
I’ll second the notion this doesn’t just impact folks near the coast. We’ve seen a lot of noise on this here too, because the PNW has so many major rivers going through metro areas which are prone to floods in the winter. Not only are the floodmaps being redrawn, which is an issue in and of itself, but we have seen a new issue out here and I’ll bet others have seen it as well. As Suburbia pushes out into new areas, and clears off more land for more houses, the flooding pattern of downstream creeks and rivers is changing dramatically. In short, flooding is getting worse for many communities downstream of new residential development. There are several lawsuits pending here because multi-million dollar damages occurred to communities (both rural and suburban) during flood events which in previous years would not have caused so much damage, thanks to land-clearing activity upstream. It’s a huge problem and only going to get more pronounced. So for the folks here, the flood maps are being redrawn not merely because of new geological information, but also because properties which were above historical flood levels are now being impacted.
We personally are only peripherally involved in this issue. Our main property is perched up on a ridgeline that sits 500ASL and is well above the valley floor. But our rental property, and the farm we’ve talked about buying, are only 30’ ASL and behind a dike that contains the nearby river. While the current property owner has never seen it flood (and he’s been there 50 years), I myself saw floodwaters come up to being level with the top of the dike, two years ago. That was a long, LONG night watching that river crest. Had it breached the dike, that land would have turned into a big lake and production that next year would have been for nothing other than tadpoles. So while our house is in good shape, this is an issue we also take pretty seriously. I’d suggest folks contact their county planning dept and see where the NEW floodplain lines have been drawn in their areas. Mo’ info, mo’ betta’.
As many of you know our kitchen was out of commission for a while due to remodeling. I am getting back into the swing of things in the kitchen by cooking today. I am posting the recipe for our main dish today. It is a crockpot recipe and will help keep your kitchen cooler. If you do the rice option, you can do that part in your rice cooker. Throw a salad at it, some rolls too, and voila! You have dinner! I think this is better than anything I’ve had at Olive Garden. No lie. LOL I like to cut up the chicken breasts and they’ll end up falling apart while cooking.
Creamy Italian Chicken
4 boneless skinless chicken breast halves
1 envelope Italian salad dressing mix (do not mix up)
1/3 cup water
1 package (8 ozs.) cream cheese, softened
1 can (10 ¾ ozs.) condensed cream of chicken soup, undiluted
1 can (4 ozs.) mushroom stems and pieces, drained
Hot cooked rice or noodles
Place the chicken breast halves in a slow cooker. Combine salad dressing mix and water; pour over chicken. Cover and cook on LOW for 3 hours. In a small mixing bowl, whisk together cream cheese and soup until blended. Stir in mushrooms. Pour cream cheese mixture over chicken. Cook 1 hour longer or until chicken juices run clear. Serve over rice or hot cooked noodles.
We’re into week four now of our own ‘where the HECK is the money going?’ issue, and we’re still wrestling with some parts of that. Despite having answered a LOT of recent questions about where our money has been going, my DH and I are still butting heads in some ways about how to manage it from now on, similar to your situation. Best I’ve been able to come up with so far for conversations like this is to try to find a 3rd alternative, a compromise somewhere between my very-logical-and-practical-and-DR-approved-approach (and if it sounds like I think my idea is better, of course I think it’s better), and his I-work-hard-for-my-money-and-I-get-to-spend-it-the-way-I-want (and if it sounds like he thinks his idea is better, of course he thinks it’s better). That’s the problem – each spouse tends to think we’re the only ones who really know what the priorities should be. Which puts us back into our own corners and if we come out of the corners at all, we come out fighting.
I’ll have an updated post on our own situation within the next day or so, because a lot has changed with it (mostly for the good). In the meantime, Kathy, hang in there and keep trying to work with him on something you can both live with. I think I saw someone define “compromise” as “when all parties are equally unhappy”. That sounds dorky but sometimes that’s really the big flag that you’ve arrived at a workable plan. Everyone got something, but no one got everything.